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Post by Lore on Feb 22, 2008 17:11:40 GMT -5
I know Erika likes this topic and I was reminded about something stupid a customer of mine did once when I saw a commercial where the exact same thing happened so I thought I'd start a topic and share since these things are usually so entertaining.
So I use to work at a copy and print shop (oh the stories I could tell about working behind the scenes there . . . ugh. Erika knows what I'm talking about) and we have two black and white copy machines and one color machine. It's a small privately owned mom-n-pop shop so that's really all we had aside from the printing press in the back. So anyway, I had a man come in with some old black and white photos and asked me to make color copies of them. I paused and said "Okay, so you want howevermany photo quality black and white copies from the color machine." And he said, "No, I want them in color."
. . .
He wasn't talking about a huge project where I go into a computer and actually add color to the images and print them out. He wanted me to put them in the color machine, push color, and have the copies come out in full color.
. . . yeah.
Dumb customers make my day.
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Post by Erika on Feb 22, 2008 17:13:47 GMT -5
...I could spend every day for the rest of my life typing stuff into this thread. For the sake of my game on Sunday, I dare not respond before then.
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Post by Lore on Feb 22, 2008 17:21:34 GMT -5
...I could spend every day for the rest of my life typing stuff into this thread. For the sake of my game on Sunday, I dare not respond before then. I created this thread for you babe. Use it when you can.
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Post by MalkavianMarine on Feb 24, 2008 9:18:21 GMT -5
thats classic . . .
I have a few similair stories ( in humor and ignorance, not color paper) from when I used to work at a grocery store back in high school
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Post by Lore on Feb 24, 2008 16:29:36 GMT -5
Then by all means, share your favorite stories. It's fun to hear about what other people have to go through.
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Post by Amazing Mr. K on Mar 7, 2008 3:03:34 GMT -5
I should find my FBI Lady story and post it here, she was truly insane.
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Post by MalkavianMarine on Mar 7, 2008 3:30:29 GMT -5
If we are going to talk about paranoid customers then I have to share mine. It might not take the cake in paranoia, but she took my award for dumbest statement of the last millenium.
So I'm 16 years old and I'm working for Kroger. It so happens that the summer that I start working at Kroger they invent teh Kroger Plus card. Don't know what it is ? Doesn't really matter but at the heart of the matter, it is a more sophisticated way for customers to save a few pennies here and there and the store can track what they should and should not stock up on the following week . . .
Ive had a particularly stressful day, partly due to customers "not" wanting if for whatever reasons, but this one lady walks into line, dressed most appropriatly for one on the run from uncle sam ( I dont know if there is a national standard for those types of people when it comes to clothes, but if there was, she was a tin foil hat away from a runway model).
"Good afternoon ma'am, did you enjoy your stay at Kroger?" "..."
In retrospect, I guess being so saccarine wasn't the best way to approach her, but oh freakin' well. After putting a few of her groceries through the scaner . . .
"Do you have a Kroger Plus Card ?" (Of course not, It was implemented a week prior and from the looks of a cart full of ramen and Toilet Paper, she doesn't get out much).
"What is that ?"
"Well, I'm glad you asked . . ." (I explain to her what it was, btw, the following are all direct quotes from her).
"Like hell I will !" She starts. " ? " I give her an inquisitive look. "That is just another way for the corporations of America to track what we all buy so they can raise the prices on us and make more money !"
"You, -wait- huh ?" That response came out of left feild for me.
""You heard me," She started again. " Kroger, TArget, Wal-mart, ESPECIALLY WALTMART, they all work together to keep prices higher than they should be! There is no way this head of lettuce is xxxx (sorry forgot the price) dollars and something cents! Well I ..."
"Ma'am," I interupted. "Shut the eff up" (I always applauded myself for staying respectful).
That was the end of the dialouge between me and her, but it surely wasn't the end of her dialouge. One thing leads to another and I get sent home three hours early for this incident (didn't get fired though, I'm Union BABY !).
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Post by Erika on Mar 7, 2008 10:07:04 GMT -5
"Ma'am," I interupted. "Shut the eff up" (I always applauded myself for staying respectful). If you call that respectful, I'd hate to see what you consider rude. Heads would roll if ANYONE said anything of the sort to a guest, no matter how crazy they were being. I'd lop em off myself if it was a person under my supervision.
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ukaia
Sidekick in Training
 
Posts: 123
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Post by ukaia on Mar 7, 2008 11:25:55 GMT -5
I think i'd be killed and fired on sight for saying that as well to anyone. Though I'm a security guard.. One incident darn near gave me a heart attack
I work third shifts, in guardshacks alone! At this one sight i had to close the rolling gates( Middle of winter yeah freaking right) and go all the way to the other side of the bulding and get semi trailor numbers and check and make sure they are empty. Well I drive it. SO since it's winter I lock my guard shack put up a sighn saying
"Please wait here. Will return in half an hour, performing rounds Security" On the window where it's eye level for most people. Then I attempt to close the rolinng gate and fail mostly, manage to get it a third of the way shut. So then i close the swinging gate proping it shut with a broom ( didn't stay shut with out the other gate)) and put several oarnge cones between the gap meaning of cource.. don't enter. The other gates ( there was an entrance and exit gate.. that was the entrance) are both swinging so i shut them. Get in my car and drive on back.
About 15 minuits into my work I glance up and suddenly have headlights in my rearview mirror. I don't think it's in my yard because who would be stupid enough to not realize.. I'm not there and please wait right? There's the interstate right beside my lot so i figure that's where the lights are from. That is .. till the semi truck hits the lights finally ( it was really dark back there) and i realize the person is in my lot.
His excuse for moving the cones, opening the gate and driving back were. I wasn't there so he was going to just drop it and go. *growls* How dumb can you be..
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Post by Amazing Mr. K on Mar 16, 2008 2:11:47 GMT -5
Here is my, "FBI Lady," story:
"Working Sundays at Jimmy Johns are usually not that fun as not many people actually want deliveries and as such I am stuck in shop most of the night, though last Sunday was the exception. Last Sunday it was business as usual and we were busy closing the store with only two customers left to take care of, us being nice even though we were technically closed. The first person we helped was really nice and Riley even gave him all of the wheat bread as he left. As the guy was ordering a small, maybe mid 40's woman walked in and sat down at the second register. As I was sweeping I told her that we could help her at the other register, to which she just looked at me and kept on sitting there staring at the vacant register. After the man left Riley walked over and asked if she was waiting for some one, to which she replied, "Does it look like I am waiting for someone?" in the one of the bitchiest tones I have ever heard. Even after hearing this Riley said that Rusty could help her down at the other register, so she walked down to the register and ordered a 6 on wheat, which Riley did not hear so he asked her what she wanted and she replied, " a six, ON WHEAT!" The funny thing is that she ordered the wheat since it was rather obvious that there was no wheat left. Hell, the guy with the last of the wheat left with it in a plastic bag while walking right in front of her, so it was pretty obvious that there was no wheat bread left. When Riley told her this she got pissed and started cussing up a storm at Riley, calling him a punk butt and telling him to f*** off just to name a few things. Riley, looking as calm as ever, told her that if she was going to have an attitude then they would not serve her and she would have to leave. This seemed to make her angrier and she continued to cuss at not only Riley, but now at Rusty as well. I finally got pissed enough that I stopped sweeping, walked over the where they were, and asked her if she needed to be escorted out of the building, which made her start cussing at me. After a few minutes of her going bats*** crazy and cussing she finally left. Riley told her to have a great night, to which she told us to f*** off. We get back to cleaning up when, a few minutes later, the phone rings. Riley picks it up and then we start to hear a lot of yelling coming out of the phone. Turns out she decided to call us to voice her opinion. So I continue to sweep as Riley is standing there listening to this verbal abuse. After a few minutes he starts to respond to her, saying things like, "Yes ma'am, I know I am a boy parts sucker, and a mother f***er," to which Rusty and I start to burst out laughing. Rusty laughs so hard that he falls over. Veronica comes back from her delivery and Riley has her listen to what the woman is saying, as well as Andrew when he comes in. So we are standing there laughing as she continues to verbally abuse Riley, saying such things as, "I know a police commissioner and they will come down there and arrest your punk butt!! I am an FBI agent and I will bring hell down upon you!! I have a college degree and do not need to be escorted any where!! I hope that you die tonight!!" Finally she stops talking and just hangs up, leaving the rest of us laughing hysterically and filling Veronica and Andrew in on what happened. A few more minutes pass and we are almost done cleaning up. Out of no where Andrew and Veronica yell something. It turns out that the lady walked by the store and slapped an FBI badge on the window, except the badge in question looks like she printed it right off of the internet. Riley hears this from Andrew and Veronica and he rushes out of the door, and waves to the left. He walks back in and tell us that she flicked him off. What a long strange night it was."
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Nziz
Dreamer
I plan to live forever. So far so good.
Posts: 11
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Post by Nziz on Sept 2, 2008 1:39:53 GMT -5
That one is indeed a winner. The lady must live an interesting life!  Also, everyone here should appreciate this comic: www.customerssuck.com/stripIt's drawn by the same person who does Devil's Panties, and there's some good stuff. People are amazingly stupid! 
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Post by Masoob on Sept 2, 2008 1:56:28 GMT -5
I can sympathize with Malkavian. Discount cards are evil because they double the time of every transaction, and also opens the door for much bitching.
I wish I would get an FBI lady at my work, even though that defies logic...
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Post by Erika on Sept 2, 2008 8:27:26 GMT -5
I read the customers suck forums religiously. On the one hand, they remind me that most of my customers are pretty good. On the other, they also get me all riled up in my mind.
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Post by psycholain on Dec 30, 2008 23:34:30 GMT -5
customers at my store call shrimp 'scrimp' and spagettii 'bagettii'. like 2 year old children! half of the time i just have to guess at what they want. working at a grocery store blows!
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Post by TheBoredOne on Dec 31, 2008 15:13:41 GMT -5
I work at Boston Market. We sell home cooked style meals. We get strange/dumb customers coming out of the woodworks.
My favorite is when customers ask for frenchfries. Haha, all the sides are in a case available for viewing by anyone with eyes, and they ask for french fries. Or pizza. Seriously?
Recently this guy came in and was like, I'll take one French Silk pie, a Pecan Pie and an Apple Pie... heheh, I was like, well, we've got pumpkin pie and apple gallet... I think he got us confused with Baker's Square o.o;
This one old woman is obsessed with sanitation, and she's always questioning whether we use our spray chemicals on the food or if we've washed our hands. I always tell her that we don't use windex on the food, because we like our customers.
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